The B List: Building The Perfect Venue
New concert venues are popping up around the country like strippers that have slept with A-Rod. Some of these new venues will be great and some will, of course, suck.
So what makes a good venue? Obviously it’s hard to compare an 15,000 seat amphitheater to a 1,000-person club. But there are certain elements that are crucial to fan happiness no matter what the size of the venue.
Here is a quick list of suggestions to keep the average concert-goer happy:
1. Have the best sound possible
Seems kind of obvious…but Terminal 5 - I am looking at you. While some musicians are fun to look at and light shows are wonderful, we are there for the sound. So when it comes to setting up the venue, the sound should be the top priority. Whatever it takes, get the sound right. Don’t roof the floor section with a giant balcony that will muddy the sound. Don’t line the walls with substances that will cause echoes or reverb. Don’t just stack the speakers wherever there is room. If you don’t get the sound right, you’ve blown it before you’ve sold the first ticket. Also don’t blow our doors off. The show should be loud…but not so loud that my ears are stinging for 12 hours afterwards. Find that nice zone where it’s plenty loud but not painful to the ear. The 9:30 Club in Washington DC has this concept down perfectly.
READ ON to find out what else Luke looks for in a new venue…
2. Have an easy way to get people in and out
The show ends and I’m half-drunk and fully tired. I want to go home. I don’t want to be forced to stand in my seat for 20 minutes because only two of the eight exits in the building are open. The same goes for entering. Have a system that maximizes your entry points and gets people in the venue and plenty of signs pointing them where to go to find their seats. The United Palace Theater, while beautiful with glorious acoustics, can’t get people in or out for shit and it’s annoying.
3. Have plenty of bathrooms
Nobody wants to spend $50 to stand in line for the john for an hour. And we’ve all seen the guy that just can’t take it anymore so he goes in the sink…or in the garbage…or on the floor…or on the guy in front of him…just not good for anyone. The newer sports venues are accounting for the bathroom crush, concert venues should too. We don’t need em spit-shined and sparkling, just functional and easily accessible.
4. Have a coat check that isn’t a complete goatfuck
Here in NYC, nothing is worse than going to a small-venue concert in the winter only to be left with the choice of waiting in line for 45 minutes to check your coat or sweating the night away in your parka. Find a way to make the coat check work so people aren’t wasting half the night standing in line. One 19-year old half-assedly manning a tiny window while blackberrying her friend and twirling her hair is not efficient. Dedicate some resources to the coat check in the winter.
5. Have a streamlined IDing process
I don’t want to miss the first four songs because I was standing on line waiting for a bald giant in a black shirt with a nose ring to check my ID. I understand the need to card people, but find a way that is quick and efficient. Carding people on the way in is a good way to get it over and done with.
6. Have an understanding security staff
Everyone has the right to feel safe at a concert. And the only way to ensure that is to employ some form of Yellow Jacket Brigade. But the security staff should know and understand the difference between someone trying to start a Mosh Pit at a Flaming Lips show (bad) and a guy in the back of the mezzanine smoking a joint (harmless). Security should mostly be dedicated to keeping people safe and not using flashlights and spy technology to catch someone taking a toke. I’m not saying a Cheech and Chong movie should be allowed to break out. But there are varying degrees of “Concert Violations” and the security team should be able to distinguish the felony from the misdemeanor.
There are certainly other elements that go into a positive concert experience like, ya know, a good band. But a well-run venue can go a long way towards helping the cause.
Nashville AKA Music City now has a LACK of music venues. Starwood/AmSouth/Whatever Ampitheater other sponsor they used to have got tore down for retail. Now City Hall (our biggest club size venue) is closed so we can get an Urban Outfitters. We lost all our outdoor concert series’ (Dancin’ in the District, Riverstages, Cannery Row Revival, Uptown Mix, etc) The Ryman is by far the best venue in Nashville, but during the Panic 3 day run they had to turn a women’s restroom into a men’s restroom because of the girl/guy ratio and the alcohol lines were awful.
Good suggestions, one thing I hate is the bathroom attendants! I don’t need you to give me soap, when all I want is to pee, wash my hands and then grab another PBR to enjoy the show…go away lady!
Great post Luke, I agree across the board. For newer venues in NYC, I think Nokia Theater got a lot of things right. They get everybody in the door quickly, there’s always at least two people at the bottom of those escalators doing ID’s/wristbands, and though they definitely have a coatcheck line at least there’s two people in there working it.
And the sound is completely out of this world - just ask Phil. Security, in my experience, definitely worries about Safety first and other issues second.
glad you mentioned 9:30 Club - great place to see/hear a show and they do it right.
Seriously with the coat check. Last year at Umphrey’s on NYE it took at least 45 minutes to get the coats after the show from this tiny little closet in the basement with 5,000 other coats in it. Total idiot-fest.
the nyc nokia is just about a perfect room for that size. great sight lines no matter where in the theater you’re sitting. the comfy chairs in the back if you don’t feel like standing with a speaker “stack” and hi-def monitors right in front of you. occasionally there’s a line to get in but it moves quickly and getting out has never been a problem for me. and the sound is perfect. crystal clear and never too loud.