When news surfaced of Live Nation’s ban on tailgating for some concerts at NJ’s PNC Bank Arts Center we thought we’d ask our resident cynical-curmudgeon Chilly Jackwater to weigh on in the issue, with what we hope will be more then a one-shot. So after months as a HT commenter, here’s Chilly:

[photo via pinkfloydz.com]

In the wake of news that Live Nation will crack down hard on tailgating at O.A.R., 311, and John Mayer shows this summer, we’ve come up with a few MORE ways that they could alienate their customers:

1. Banning residents of Chelsea from attending Madonna concerts
2. Prohibiting Hawaiian shirts at Jimmy Buffet shows
3. Announcing that Poison cannot play Every Rose Has Its Thorn this summer
4. Banning horn-rimmed glasses and facial hair at Arcade Fire shows
5. Prohibiting any use of cell phone cameras at Animal Collective concerts
6. Making the age limit at Umphrey’s McGee shows 30+
7. Making the age limit at Rolling Stones shows 20-
8. Enforcing a “Smooth Jazz Performances Only” edict at McCarren Pool

Here’s a tip for any of you who work in big business in ANY industry: At this point in time, following the example of record labels and the RIAA - which is EXACTLY what Live Nation is doing - is not exactly the recipe for success. Essentially Live Nation is taking away tailgating, a major aspect of the summer show-going experience, from a humongous group of customers who kinda sorta like that stuff: College-aged fans.

READ ON for more of Chilly’s warm feelings for Live Nation…

Now, I’m no hot-shot Wall Street CEO with a fancy car and a corner office, but giving your customer base a reason not to purchase your product usually doesn’t increase sales. Telling O.A.R. and 311 fans that they are taking a huge risk by tailgating at PNC will do two things: 1) Force ticket holding drinkers to drive to the venue drunk (Sweet move) and 2) Keep the money that many kids would have spent on those tickets in their pockets. Now I could make jokes about how seeing 311 and O.A.R. sober will probably do more good than harm to these kids (”Maybe they’ll finally realize how crappy the music is!”), but I’m not going to. (Whoops).

But seriously, I’m done with this industry. Anyone who works at any of these conglomerates should just give up now. You’ve totally lost it. And by “it” I mean everything: Your mind, your money, your future earnings, our respect, and soon, your job.